Creative Entrepreneurs – Zero Fox to Give

Creative Entrepreneurs – Zero Fox to Give

I’m totally going to get in trouble for the title. Although to my credit, I used Fox instead of Fucks. Which really, is the subject of this post.

Recently I posted an Instagram selfie that was taken at the airport in Philadelphia, before boarding my flight on the way home back to Denver.

The caption reads:

“#selfiesunday #nomakeup I have a low cut, flowered shirt on today, I’m flying home.

I was randomly selected to be searched, both myself and my bag. Because the bad people show boobs. I have zero fucks to give and will wear what I want lol.”

Someone sent me a message and said the caption was offputting, because it implies that I don’t care. Zero fucks to give, right? Clearly that means I don’t care!

Believe me when I say that nothing can be further from the truth.

I can’t even tell you how many times I care TOO much. I’m an empath, that energy gets into my brain, and it is incredibly difficult for me to get past caring so much.

One thing that I have had to learn in running my own business, is when to care, and when to move on. And man, that is a really, really difficult skill to master. I wouldn’t go so far as to say that I’ve mastered it, but I am getting better.

A very wise woman and coach recently told me something that hit me like a ton of bricks. I’m paraphrasing here so I don’t want to quote her – but it basically went like this.

When you wake up in the morning, you only have a limited amount of fucks to give every day. It is finite, there are only so many. You have to choose where you give those fucks very carefully, because once they’re gone, you’re drained and shit hits the fan.

(PS and sidenote – Kristen is brilliant and has a fantastic sale right now of multiple business resources, click here to check it out.)

This thought blew my mind – how many fucks do I get every day? Why am I wasting them? The person in front of me that is being a jerk at the grocery store – are they really worth one of my fucks? What if I give them that fuck, and then my kids need something and I’m out?

SERIOUSLY – this concept completely blew me away.

And ever since she told me this, I have been taking an inventory of my days. When something happens that upsets me, I have to ask myself, is it worth giving one of my fucks away? Is it worth draining myself over, when I might need that energy for something truly important?

When it comes to business for photographers or creative entrepreneurs, this can take so many different forms.

For the person that emails you and tells you that you are too expensive – is that worth getting upset about? Or do you say I appreciate your inquiry, and I wish you the best of luck in your search?

For the bride that sends you a shot list a mile long – do you freak out and go into photography groups on Facebook and “vent” while going on and on about how Pinterest is ruining your wedding photography? Or do you send an email explaining the value of artistic vision, and while you appreciate the suggestions, you work hard with your clients to create the best and personalized images for THEIR day?

For the person that commented on social media on one of your clients’ photos with criticism – do you get upset and wonder what the hell is wrong with this person, resulting in calling everyone you know to talk about how social media is the downfall of the world and how people take advantage of internet balls to hurt others? Or do you calmly screenshot and remove the comment, with a personalized note to the commenter that while you value their opinion, a private message is the more appropriate avenue to share.

Don’t get me wrong – there are definitely situations that require giving away some fucks. If an album is running late and is needed in hand by a certain date – make the phone calls, offer exemplary customer service, and work to remedy the situation. If a bride is upset because grandma is photobombing every portrait shot (how funny would that be), definitely take charge and in a gentle but firm way, work with the family to make sure that the photobomber is taken care of. Maybe get her a cocktail.

But really, when it comes to so many things that we, as business owners, tend to freak out about – are they worth it? Are those situations worth giving away those precious fucks? What if something big comes up in your business that requires more fucks than usual? What if one of your kids falls on the playground and has to go to the emergency room, requiring you to drop everything and give ALL the fucks to that situation?

Remaining calm in situations that are frustrating can be an unbelievable asset in your business.

Save your fucks, and your energy, for things that are WORTH it.

Loving on your toddler when she shows you a piece of grass she thought was amazing. Laughing at ridiculous fart jokes with your pre-teen son. Sharing your gift with your clients. Marketing for new clients. Amazing customer service for existing clients. Volunteering for a cause that really moves your heart. Serving others. Filling your creative tank with the things that make your heart sing. THESE are all things that are worth the fucks.

You only have so many, don’t waste them on small things. Like wearing a low cut shirt through airport security. Sorry mom.